How healthy couples deal with Immaturity


All of us fall short of the demands of life in some or the other way. This is quite normal and in most marriages both spouses have found ways for dealing with the shortcomings of their partners. However,  the situation is more difficult, if one spouse seems to be unable to deal with a normal daily load and the other has a hard time accepting his/her weakness. For instance, husband may have trouble controlling his spending habits and thus ruins his wife’s attempts to manage the tight family budget. These are difficult situations ! Below are the simple suggestions that we can follow in such a difficult situations.

1). Accept reality
Both of you have promised to unconditionally accept your spouse no matter what life will bring. And soon, you will discover, that both you and your mate have certain weaknesses.Accepting reality helps focusing on a solution instead of the problem.

2). Communicate your support to your spouse
Growing out of immaturities is difficult if we have to do this in an environment where we are judged, nagged, condemned, or resented. We need to feel that our spouse is on our side and supports us.

3). Own your problems
Some people have difficulties accepting that they are doing things that cause pain to their spouse. They react defensively when being confronted with their own weaknesses, blame their spouse for their problem, or claim that their behavior is perfectly normal and that their spouse is totally unrealistic. Don’t fight the truth but welcome correction, even if it is uncomfortable.

4). Get a plan
Once the problem has become clear to both partners, it is time to find ways to address it. Make a plan. Decide what is needed to solve the problem and what can be done to follow through with the solution. You may need help from others, maybe therapy, or counseling.

We hope you found this article valuable and hope it gave you great idea on how to deal with  internal causes of conflitcs in marriage. Got any views to share? Let us know in the comments box below.

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